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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind

Just over a year ago I read an eye-opening article in the July issue of Ensign. It got me thinking very seriously about my career goals and what hobbies I could incorporate into my life.

At the time I read the article, I was struggling to find my identity in the workplace and to find out what I could do in my spare time to feel satisfied. Kev and I were working around the clock to prepare the Pink House so it was livable. On top of that, I was working full-time and Kev spent long shifts working outside in all kinds of weather for Weber County. We were exhausted. We were spent. Physically, I was fine. But mentally, I was stagnant.

I made the decision to pursue a Pilates or Yoga certification. I was blessed with the opportunity to get into a workshop for PiYo just five months later. Accomplishing that goal so quickly gave me a jump-start mentally. Timing was on my side because a friend needed to take leave of her class and decided to offer it to me. I currently spend a lot of time reviewing exercises and challenging myself to be a better teacher. I don't let my class take it easy and I enjoy hearing them complain about how exhausted they are during the workouts. It means I'm doing a good job! They always get up from the relaxation period saying they feel refreshed and calm. I feel satisfied.

As I focus on my career goals, It has been hard to relinquish control to others and allow them to navigate me in another direction. But that's what I'm doing. I put forth my best efforts and will now let come what may. The biggest difference between now and a year ago is my attitude. Thanks to therapy and medication, I'm hopeful again that the future can hold good change for me.

Something that really helps me feel hopeful for the future is that fact that I finally found a new job. A new job with extremely comparable pay, the opportunity to earn commission on top of my salary, and that has straight-up admitted to being family-friendly. I was told in my interview that when my time came to start a family, my boss would be 100% supportive of my needs and allow me to decide my future at the agency. No more guilt trips about whether or not my need to leave work at any time is due to a bun in the oven.

When I left the interview, I got into my car and starting crying. I had spent nine months looking for different work. Nine months of applying and not getting interviews; nine months of getting interviews and then getting rejected; nine months of tears, frustration, helplessness and uncertainty. And after just one short interview in the dining room of my future boss' home, I felt relief. I felt such gratitude that I had been led to this opportunity.

Hindsight is always 20/20. I appreciate that so much. While I was always grateful that I had employment (even if it was something I don't like) I am now even more grateful for the job that I'm leaving. It was through an associate at my current job that I found this opportunity. Additionally, my experience with WSU is beneficial since it relates to my new job.

It's like I've finally opened my eyes to see the blueprints God designed for my life. I understand why I've had certain trials the last nine months. And I can honestly say I'm grateful for them.


  1. I am so glad you got that job. I was hoping you would. It sounded like the perfect situation for you. Yeah for you. I think you deserve an IKEA shopping spree. Good luck to you in your new job.

  2. So what will you be doing, I want to work there. I need to call you back so we can get together dangit I'm so bad at calling people. Just know that very soon I will call you and you better answer.

  3. I wish you all the best. You deserve it.

  4. Thank you ladies!

    Tiff, I'll be working with a real estate agency in mid-August. My schedule is usually wide open on Tues/Thurs nights and most weekends I have time to play! We'll see how things change with the new job though :)

  5. Yay Liv! I couldn't be happier for you. And just know you always have a spot in Pilates - just tell me what works best with your new awesome schedule :)

  6. i am so happy for you! it is amazing when things finally work out :] congrats!!

  7. Im sure you are an awesome pilates teacher! And that is wonderful about the new job, congratulations.


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