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Saturday, March 27, 2010

Week 21

Why do people feel the need to offer advice about pregnancy when they've just met me for the first time?

And why do people think I'm being serious when I refer to my dog as my first child? I mean, yes, she is a huge part of my family, but I know she's not the same thing as a human baby. I know that waking up with her once a night and letting her outside is no where near the same as waking up with a human baby multiple times a night for feedings and diaper changes. I'm not stupid. I do understand that having a dog is not the same as having a human baby.

My favorite tidbit of advice is to enjoy sleeping in while I can. As if I don't know that I'll be sleeping less, if at all, after the baby comes. Do people honestly think that I don't relish sleeping in until 8am on weekends? Because guess what... I really do consider it a triumph when I sleep that late. Oh, and here's a newsflash for you: I'm not sleeping all that great right now anyway. I'm up at least once a night to pee, and up multiple times just laying awake thinking for prolonged periods of time.

Other great advice I couldn't do without are reminders that once the baby comes, life won't be about just me and Kev anymore. Really? I didn't consider that when I started growing this person inside of me. Thanks for enlightening me.

Lastly, if one more person tells me that I should be feeling glowy and refreshed any day now, I'm going to punch them in the face. I have the skin of a greasy adolescent, the beer belly of an avid football fan and the energy of a fat kid who honestly believes that video games are exercise. I'm tapped out. Just accept the fact that I don't have the luxury of sitting around to enjoy being pregnant and stop promising me I'll get there.

End rant.

This post brought to you by lack of sleep, a stuffy nose, a sore throat, a headache and pregnancy hormones.

7 comments:

  1. Liv, you crack me up. Pregnancy advice is almost always unwanted and obvious. Everyone thinks they know better than you because they have been through it, but pregnancy is different for every single person. Here's to hoping you don't get as much unsolicited advice :) P.S. sometimes I know I am an offender of advice so if I ever do, sorry in advance.

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  2. I don't know you, but am sending hugs! Nobody really needs all the pregnacy advice from wierdos! (Trust me, even when you are on #4, the crazies have thier opinions!)

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  3. livia, just you wait you will just start glowing and you will light up rooms and you should really nap more now to stock up on sleep and maybe you should stop eating so many oreos because you're kiiiind of looking big these days... just thought i would let you know.

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  4. The other day, a very pregnant co-worker of mine was wearing a promotional T-shirt (for an event we were working) and I actually leaned over and patted her belly. I COULDN'T HELP IT! It's just so huge and round and adorable.

    I instantly felt stupid and apologized, but the point is, something about pregnant women makes the rest of us instinctively want to take care of you, which includes offering advice. I KNOW it's annoying, but try not to take it the wrong way!

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  5. At least I knew the advice would come, and I'm not surprised by any of it :)

    It's just... when someone offers this advice with a smug look and air of superiority I want to pinch them.

    It's like when you get married and everyone wants to tell you exactly what it will be like.

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  6. I've (obviously) received no pregnancy advice, but have gotten tons of pre-parenthood advice once people find out I've been married for longer than 19 seconds and don't have kids. "Enjoy your time together," "Life will never be the same after you have kids," and "Life doesn't really begin until after you have a baby" are common. Makes me want to smack people.

    I've tried to significantly limit my "advice" to people — about ANYTHING — lately.

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  7. This cracks me up! The joys of pregnancy and marriage. Everyone wants to give you advice as soon as you're engaged and then when you have a baby everyone has answers. At least everyone cares enough to want to offer their own advice, including people at the grocery store whom you've never met, the doctor's office, and everywhere else you go, right?

    Thanks for making me smile. :)

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