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Monday, December 12, 2011

An unexpected turn of events.

I haven't seen my dad in almost 16 years. He made some bad choices and they ultimately led to him not choosing us.

When he left my immediate family, contact with his side of the family tree mostly ended. To me, it seems there was a lot of misunderstanding and confusion, and it was just a lot easier to get on with our lives separately.

Eight years ago, my paternal grandmother (Nana) was dying. Through the family grapevine my brothers and I found out, and we drove 4 hours to Southern Utah in the blazing summer heat without A/C in the car. We visited for a little while with grandparents we no longer knew, and then we turned around and drove back north.

This weekend, the family grapevine once again alerted me and my brothers of an ailing grandparent. This time it was my paternal grandfather. No one's sure how much longer he'll live.

I had no idea what to expect when we made plans to visit him. My cousin informed us that Grandpa was in and out of lucidness and there was a chance he wouldn't even know us. Regardless, we knew we were doing the right thing by visiting with him. And, thankfully, he no longer lives in Southern Utah so the trip wasn't going to be anywhere near as uncomfortable as the one we took eight years prior.

My brothers and I walked into my Grandpa's room and found him sleeping. We hesitantly woke him, and did our best not to scare him to death. We introduced ourselves, but didn't know if he understood. Additionally, we didn't know if he could even hear us. Eventually we noticed a notepad on the counter with other names and notes from visitors. So we wrote our names, and whose children we were. We pulled down the old photos of us that he has tacked in his room and hoped that helped him understand.

The only thing he said to us was "I'm overwhelmed." I'm hopeful he meant that in a good way.


  1. I think it is awesome you guys went to see him. Even if he didn't understand or feel like seeing you guys right then, I am sure he is truly grateful you came.

  2. That was really nice of you guys to go visit him.


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