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Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde

"You were what they call a 'Mother Killer.' But I survived you, your babysitters survived you, and your dance teacher survived you."

I was sitting on Aspen's picnic table in the backyard when my mom reminded me of my temperament as a child. I made the mistake of complaining that, lately, Aspen had been more than I can handle. When one tantrum ends, something sets off another one. And then another, and another. You could call it karma. I was so wretched that it was bound to come back to me sooner or later.

After a week of dealing with the nightmare that has become my child, it culminated in a one-hour-long fit of crying, coughing, hitting and hair-pulling. It was the result of an unsuccessful trip to the Library. One during which I could not A) get Aspen's shoes on so we could get out of the car or B) get Aspen out of the car without her shoes. Neither choice was working for her, so I drove us home and explained that without shoes or getting out of the car, we were not going to the Library today.

That was all she needed to have the epic meltdown of her life. I tried to talk with her when we got in the house, but she preferred laying on the floor, rolling around and screaming. I tried ignoring her. I tried diverting her attention. I tried calling Daddy so we could tell him we love him. Nothing worked. So, for an hour she cried. She coughed. She yelled. Then she started throwing things and hitting me. So I wrestled her into her crib and let her cry while I sat in her chair and read "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" aloud.

Eventually she found a binky amidst her blankets and her screaming subsided to body-shaking sobs. Then just sniffles. Then an interest in getting out of the crib.

We didn't have another meltdown as bad as the first of the day, but they continued. She managed to stop long enough to eat a really good lunch (I'm so thankful she has her appetite back) and go with me to the church to drop off a salad for a funeral. Her reward for good behavior was a visit with Zjani and her kids so I could drop off a check for my newly-blonde hair.

I know Aspen is not technically in the 'Mother Killer' category like I was. But she's working on it this week. I understand that being sick makes it hard to feel happy. I also understand that lack of eating doesn't help. She's all sorts of jacked up and doesn't know how to deal with it. Guess what! I don't know how to deal with it either.


  1. We have lots of tantrums over here too. It is just the age, I like to think. I was a temper tantrum throwing little brat. My poor mom. I still apologize to this day. Well, I guess I was not that bad, but I was up there. I try to stay calm and think that one day this stage will be over, but it is hard some days to look past all the tantrum throwing. Oh and I got told to 'Shut up' the other day by Jesse. I don't say that to them at all, but he learned just how to use it. Oh and he loves to call me 'Trin' instead of mom when he is angry. I await the other unpleasant sayings to come with a guarded heart, knowing he doesn't mean it or even understand how hurtful some things are; yet. Oh the joy of being a mom. I do love it so and my two darling boys. :) You are doing a fabulous job and I love reading your posts.

  2. Oh my, sounds a little like my house lately too. This week of hotel living (we're in Denver) has thrown Makai completely for a loop and my little boy has transformed into a little monster right before my eyes. Being excited for vacation to end is not cool. Hope things get better in your house soon. I just keep thinking, "hello early terrible twos."


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