I'm at the point I can't sleep at night because I'm too busy wondering if I'm going to suddenly go into labor.
My tendency to worry everything to death does not mix well with being patient about having a baby. I keep thinking how awkward it would be if I go into labor while on a neighborhood walk with Aspen and the dog. Do I just hurry home? Do I stop at a neighbor's? I don't always bring my phone with me and I probably should buuut yoga pants don't have pockets... dilemma.
I also hate making plans for the upcoming weeks because I'm so worried about cancelling on people. I mean, seriously. Everyone will understand if I can't make it to the BBQ/field trip/book club/WHATEVER because I'm having a freakin baby.
Even with all these things swirling around in my head, I am committed to letting things run their course (being stubborn is yet another strong personality trait I possess). I don't want to be induced unless I'm at a risky point past my due date. I figure it's the least I can do for this baby; let him come when he's ready. And although this is what I've been telling myself for weeks, I was unexpectedly emotional and depressed yesterday when I had my appointment and learned there's been no progress. No signs that baby is coming.
Really, this should be good news. Especially since at this time, there is literally no where to put him. All during Kev's project I've been planning to put the pack 'n play (with the bassinet attachment) up in the living room and call that good. But when I tried to find the pack 'n play this week I couldn't. So... He can sleep in a laundry basket? Or the baby swing? Aspen slept in her bouncy chair for at least the first five weeks (and then she went through a phase when napped in it when she was two!), so that should be good enough for her brother, too. I seem to remember having this exact same conundrum before Aspen was born... wondering where on earth I was going to put her due to the remodelling. And that worked out just fine!
Thankfully these are all just normal, regular things to worry about. We have the important things covered, like who's going to get Aspen if I go into labor in the middle of the night, and who will care for Maddie-dog while Kev and I are at the hospital. Really, nothing else after that matters. I successfully organized a couple of drawers' worth of clothes for the baby (in Aspen's room), I found the breast pump (even if I can't pull it out from under all the other containers by myself quite yet), I have diapers and I have a freezer that's filling up with meals. That's all we need!
But it'd still be nice to have a little hint as to when this dude's coming.
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