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Thursday, November 10, 2016

Day - writing prompt

Lincoln woke up Wednesday with a very stuffy nose and extra grumpy attitude. I was able to get someone to cover me at work, and spent the entire day trying not to pull my ears off my head to escape the whining. Biologically, Linc is wired to suction-cup himself to me if he's awake and I'm in the same building as him. When he's sick, it's exponentially worse. When I'm gone, however, he's completely fine and happy and a totally different kid. Lucky me, right?

So while I feel badly for Linc being sick, when I've done all I can to care for him and still can't go into another room without listening to him scream at me, I completely lose my mind. There's only so much I can give every single day and night to my kids, and if they're not bleeding to death I feel like I should be "allowed" to go to the bathroom by myself, or even just walk into the kitchen for a drink. Without fail, any time I left Linc's sight on Wednesday, he'd call out "MOM WHERE ARE YOOOOOOU?!" And then he'd command me to return and play with him, which really meant sit and be bored to death watching him repeatedly crash cars into trains on his wooden tracks.

I didn't get to shower, or brush my teeth until long after the kids were in bed. I didn't talk to another adult until Kev got home from work for a few minutes before leaving again. I didn't put in my contact lenses or leave the house except to take Aspen to school. It was a dark day. I don't like being stuck at home because I'm so paranoid my kids will share their germs and other parents will hate me for getting their kids sick. It sounds selfish that I'm not shedding tears for Linc having a cold, but I guarantee I'm making him more than comfortable despite his circumstances.

I'm hopeful this new day will be better. I'm hopeful I'll see the light of day from the outside of my house. I'm hopeful I'll talk to other grown ups. And maybe not give in and put my kids to bed at 7.

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